We'll Be Counting Calories

Ah, calories. That pesky little unit that is both revered and feared by so many. Of course, calories refer to an amount of energy, but they have come to mean much more than that and can make or break a food’s popularity rating… (celery is a classic example of how a disgusting food can suddenly rise to fame because of its low caloric value). So should we be counting calories?

Many diets and weight loss/maintenance programmes would suggest that yes, you should count calories if you want to have control over your weight. This makes complete sense as it alludes to the fundamental “energy in vs energy out” equation. But I don’t think it’s as simple as that. I actually think that calorie counting can be misleading and have a negative affect on our relationship and behaviours around food.

Firstly, to suggest that you need a set amount of calories per day would suggest that every day is the same. But we burn a different amount of calories from one day to the next depending on a variety of factors. Sticking to a strict number of calories may mean that we stop listening to ourbody’s signals that tell us when we need more fuel or have had enough.

Calorie counting also doesn’t necessarily take into account the quality of those calories. Although it may seem an extreme example, on a strictly calorie counting diet eating 1000 calories of mars bars or lettuce leaves would be the same, when we can clearly see that it’s not. Calories are not a full representation of a food’s nutritional value or “healthiness”, and so only looking at this value means we are ignoring other equally important facts.

Perhaps the thing that concerns me most about counting calories, though, is how it can quite quickly become obsessive. Doing anything multiple times a day will quickly become a habit, and when you are expected to note down everything you eat and drink, and check the calories of all of those things, it’s no wonder that it doesn’t take long before it becomes your primary thought considering food.

Towards the beginning of my eating disorder, unsurprisingly I became quite concerned about calories. It started out with keeping a record of everything I ate and drank each day, but before long I was checking the calories in everything, weighing and counting food to make sure I was reporting accurately. Whenever I went out for dinner, the first thing I would look at on the menu (often online before I even got to the restaurant) was the calories, and I would choose whichever option had the lowest calories. It didn’t matter what it was, I didn’t care. I remember being sat in Nandos with my Garden Salad that was only 25 calories, smiling and pretending that I’d chosen it because it was what I wanted. When really, I was looking at my friends enjoying their food, longing to allow myself a proper meal, all the while knowing that in my current state of mind I would never be able to.

Somehow the calories had gained all control… the calories were consuming me. And it took months and months of therapy and hard work to stop thinking about it, to let go of my fear of calories and certain foods.

The thing is, when you are constantly counting and monitoring, when do you let go? Even if you don’t check the values of what you’re eating at the time, you’ll probably be thinking about it, you might even feel regret later on. There were times when I was trying not to check these kinds of things anymore that the fear just overwhelmed me and I had to spend time researching afterwards so I knew exactly how many calories I’d consumed.

And when you’re overly concerned about calories coming in, you’re probably equally concerned about calories going out, and you can get yourself into a cycle of exercising with the sole aim of burning calories, forgetting the many other benefits that exercising brings. I know all too well what an addiction to exercise feels like, that need to know that I had done something to burn calories, and the panic that could rise in my throat if I didn’t. Exercise was no longer enjoyable, or even something I did for my health. It was purely there to satisfy my eating disorder.

The thing is, calorie counting can seem harmless or even necessary, and to an extent it is. But actually I think it’s more important to get a wider angle view of what you’re eating. And not just the nutritional information, but how it makes you feel, whether you really enjoy it.

Food is something that we need, but it is a sociable and enjoyable part of life and I think sometimes we need to step back and be a little less concerned about the label; it could well be a blessing for your body as well as your mind.